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Well This Ought to Cheer You UP!
How do Bush-Voting States Compare to Kerry-Voting States?
Purple States | Education | Degrees | Divorce | Teen Mothers | Chlamydia | Taxes & Big Goverment |
Slavery | Lynchings | Shootings | Income | Success | Baseball |
Bush versus Kerry - Republicans versus Democrats - Conservatives versus Liberals. Progressives versus Neocons. Categorize them how you’d like, but I’d hardly call George Bush an actual “conservative”. We need new terminology. We now have those who are in “red” states and those who are in “blue” states. The Reds are evidently for big government spending, surveillance of ordinary citizens, unprovoked invasion, state religion, and foreign entanglement. If you want to call that “conservative” I have issues with you. I prefer to call it “un-American”. But we’ll stick with Reds and Blues.
I'm sure you've all seen the electoral map. Indeed, many have been staring
at it until bloodshot. It was so close. But how come it looks so RED?
As a neuroscientist at the Albert Einstein College of Medicine in New York,
I thought, “Maybe a little research would clear things up.”
I asked myself many times over this election,
- "How can any person see what is happening and vote for this person?"
- "How can people believe that Saddam had nuclear weapons? How can anyone
believe that Bush didn't know the truth?"
-"Who are these people who believed so deeply that we were liberating Iraq
that they ignored what the Iraqis have told us—that we are invaders—just
like they invaded Kuwait, we are doing the same."
-"How could U.S. Marine Cpl Chin fly all the way to Baghdad, fight a war,
and then STILL drape a flag from the Pentagon 9-11 attacks over Saddam's statue?
Don't people know that Iraq had nothing to do with it?"
-"How can you say you are voting for “morals” when you are
clearly voting on race, religious hatred, violence, and invasion?"
-Which led me to my final question: "Don't these people READ?"
Well, as you will see from my research, they indeed do NOT read.
I hope the following graphs, and their correlation to the election graph, will
make you all feel a little better about being in a blue state. Who are these
Reds? I hope that this information will convince you that if you are a thoughtful,
successful, kind individual that voted for George W. Bush, then perhaps you
might be happier to seek better company voting for a different party. As my
mother always says, you are who your friends are after all.
First let's look at the electoral map:
But is America really that divided? Aren't there "purple states" that are near the middle? Indeed, most states were within 5%. Here are the states that are within 3%, as well as a chart of states by county, not just red or blue but the "in-between", followed by a chart from Robert J. Vanderbei at Princeton University.
That doesn't look too much like 50/50 either. Perhaps it is the fact that it is not by county, or that big empty states are preferred over small dense states. From Mr. Vanderbei's page:
Yes, the votes in New York City are more than the big empty West. But NY gets just a dot, even on this map.
For more information you can also go HERE to see other maps that have counties redrawn according to population size:
(From Michael Gastner, Cosma Shalizi, and Mark Newman, University of Michigan)
Okay, we know the election was very close, and that this business about the
country being red is hype, BUT WHO ARE THESE RED FOLKS?
Well, they don't read.
Here are the numbers on education for grade schools:
Top
10 |
(looking redder) |
Bottom
10 |
||
1. Massachusetts | 11. Maine | 21. Colorado | 31. Michigan | 41. Tennessee |
2. Connecticut | 12. Virginia | 22. South Dakota | 32. South Carolina | 42. Hawaii |
3. Vermont | 13. Nebraska | 23. Rhode Island | 33. West Virginia | 43. California |
4. New Jersey | 14. New Hampshire | 24. Illinois | 34. Texas | 44. Alabama |
5. Wisconsin | 15. Kansas | 25. North Carolina | 35. Oregon | 45. Alaska |
6. New York | 16. Wyoming | 26. Missouri | 36. Arkansas | 46. Louisiana |
7. Minnesota | 17. Indiana | 27. Delaware | 37. Kentucky | 47. Mississippi |
8. Iowa | 18. Maryland | 28. Utah | 38. Georgia | 48. Arizona |
9. Pennsylvania | 19. North Dakota | 29. Idaho | 39. Florida | 49. Nevada |
10. Montana | 20. Ohio | 30. Washington | 40. Oklahoma | 50. New Mexico |
8 of 10 of the most educated states are blue. 8 of 10 of the least educated
are red. Aha! So they are stupid. That's why they believe this stuff.
Need a picture?
(I plotted these numbers to the states in question. These are the findings of the Education State Rankings, a survey by Morgan Quitno Press of hundreds of public school systems in all 50 states. States were graded on a variety of factors based on how they compare to the national average. These included such positive attributes as per-pupil expenditures, public high school graduation rates, average class size, student reading and math proficiency, and pupil-teacher ratios. States received negative points for high dropout rates and physical violence. See http://cnn.netscape.cnn.com/news/package.jsp?name=fte/smartstates/smartstates)
Also, from available census data, and information given at the Missouri ACT
national conference, you can get data of what percentage of people in a state
are enrolled in college, and what percentage are enrolled in High School. You
can plot them against each other and see how states rank in terms of who has
the highest percentages of both. And since we know the election data, we can
color code that too.
Here it is in a remarkable graph:
(Source: M. Podgursky & R. Monroe (2004), Education and State Economic
Performance: Evidence from the 2000 Census, Dept of Economics, University of
Missouri – Columbia, Missouri ACT Annual Conference presentation)
Top
Well how about the “sanctity of marriage”? They spent a lot of time
talking about it, but you had the feeling they'd rather talk about gays.
They talked about it so much SURELY these church-going folks stay married? Right?
Uh-Oh. It looks like those liberal New Englanders are at it again –smarter
AND more faithful to their spouses.
But is that true? Are the fundamentalist Reds obsessed about sex because they
have something to hide? Could the New Englanders beat them at brains, marital
bliss and sexual morality? Oh you bet they do.
(Source: statehealthfacts.org)
Top
Okay. Their kids seem to have tattered schoolbooks, get knocked up, and then
divorced. I think we are getting a picture here of a certain region of the country.
Up here in Blue-land, we are staying married and staying in school, and waiting
until we get married. If only the Reds would just adopt our moral lifestyle.
So they are hedonistic too. What are the consequences of this immoral, right
wing fundamentalist lifestyle, you ask?
(Source: statehealthfacts.org)
Top
The Clap! My goodness. All that preaching to us about our immorality up here
in Blue land with no apparent basis in reality.
Okay, it's stupid home-wreckers with trampy VD infested kids, versus smart,
family-oriented, healthy kids who you aren't getting knocked up at 13. I know
which side I'd rather be on.
What about "compassionate conservatism"? Surely people who vote on
morals care about racial equality. Okay, you know the answer here but check
it out anyway.
What about since the civil war?
Well, what else could be going wrong for these Reds? No wonder they are looking for a dictator to clean things up. They obviously need one. If only we didn't have to have the same leaders. What are their views regarding violence? I suspect that people who support an unprovoked attack on another country might be violent themselves. (Yes, I mean IRAQ, it's the boot-shaped one that isn't Italy in the Middle East section of your history books. Oh yeah, you don't have any books). They are always telling us how dangerous the blue states are, and how they need their guns. What about morals like "thou shall not kill?"
Well they are enjoying their tax cuts for the wealthy aren't they. Sorry Reds, we Blues got that too. It looks like you need to vote Blue next time. Thanks for the check!
Top 10 tax freeloaders | Top 10 paying for it |
1. D.C. (+$5.59) | 1. New Jersey (-$0.43) |
2. New Mexico (+$0.99) | 2. New Hampshire (-$0.36) |
3. Alaska (+$0.89) | 3. Connecticut (-$0.35) |
4. Mississippi (+$0.83) | 4.Minnesota (-$0.30) |
5. West Virginia ($0.82) | 5. Nevada (-$0.30) |
6. North Dakota ($0.75) | 6. Illinois (-$0.27) |
7. Alabama ($0.69) | 7. Massachusetts (-$0.22) |
8. Montana ($0.60) | 8. California (-$0.22) |
9. Virginia ($0.68) | 9. New York (-$0.21) |
10. Hawaii ($0.68) | 10. Colorodo (-$0.20) |
(how much more or less their getting per dollar taxed in parenthesis, sources as above)
This is not suprising, as indicated in the income chart above the Blues have the money and the Reds are saving up for that new set of wooden teeth. All the Reds talk about is how annoyed they are that the blue states believe the government is the solution to everything, and annoyed that they believe that government money is their only solution to a problem. We hear that Reds believe in "conservative fiscal policy". Well those outlandish statements about big government are true but only in the red states. The blue states have to wake up and realize that they are subsidizing the itinerant lifestyles of these states. Meanwhile,the Blue states are where the good jobs and good wages are. Because we have sensible regulations, and support our citizens in a good place to do work and a good place to get talented individuals if you want to do business, not handouts for government programs. We Blues should push to cut federal spending on state programs because these state programs are predominantly in red states. Let the red states vote with us to send them into further poverty, disease, and illiteracy. They don't deserve the highways, waterlines and electricity, we are building for them. Let them live in a darkened aluminum shack at the end of a dirt road. Come to think of it, what does that image bring to mind? Connecticut? I don't think so.
We up here in Massachusetts don't grow cotton. We'd rather buy it at the 5 cents a ton it's actually worth than pay for Mississipi to grow it for a profit and then overcharge us for it. The South has to realize that the slaves aren't coming back and it's not worth growing that stuff anymore. The West has to grow up and realize it may be fun to put on cowboy boots, but there is a reason why nobody lives out there. Please try to produce something useful for the rest of us. It's not the 19th century anymore. Heck, it's not even the 20th. Get with the program. We don't have to pay for their lifestyle choices anymore than we should write a check to the Phonoecians to build more rowboats. Tell your Red friends: if they hate government programs so much: send us our money back!
That's right we're better at baseball. Maybe if you guys would get out there and get a little exercise you'd do better, which brings me to my next point....Obesity.
So what are these fat diseased pregnant teens doing on a saturday? Why, they're driving around and running into people of course. In addition to killing more innocent people while driving drunk (right chart), they are also all around poorer drivers. It's a wonder that they keep driving into each other in states where there is so little to hit.
So we are richer, thinner, smarter, with better marriages, and more wholesome
children. Reds you'd better put down that pork chop and vote for healthcare
because we aren't writing checks to help you to take care of that Chlamydia.
Ilir Topalli, Ph.D.
Albert Einstein College of Medicine
topalli@yahoo.com